Glitches in the Matrix

One day last week, I went to the cafeteria for lunch and had the "Beef Chili Con Carne". Uh ... that would translate as "Beef Chili with Meat". Why the double billing for meat without even mentioning the beans? Then, when I rode the elevator back to my floor, the elevator stopped beeping going past floors 9 and 10. It beeped passing all the other floors, but not those two. I said to the other guy in the car, "A glitch in the matrix." And he says, "Yeah. At first I thought it was my hearing." Then, today the elevator doesn't beep again - but this time it's only passing 10. Then, I'm riding home on the bus and this alarm is wailing away but nobody seems to notice. It was like I was the only person who could hear it. I'm riding in a compressed natural gas bus with an alarm wailing away; and I'm thinking to myself, "I guess the bus is going to blow up and nobody cares." Isn't someone on the bus supposed to attend to those alarms ... like, maybe the driver? At least the bus didn't actually blow up.

Notes from the Lost World - Part 2

Somehow I managed to lose my glasses Wednesday night. How is that possible? I had to wear my sun glasses to work Thursday - to my new job in the city. There was no way to disguise them; and I had no excuse if anyone asked - which everyone did. It was embarrassing to explain - over and over - how I lost them inside my own house. I found them Thursday night tangled up in the rigging of a model ship. It must be the Borrowers. I can think of no other plausible explanation.