Don't Know Much About ...

I sat at the bar with an English chap and had a beer. He is living in the U.S. now; and he has two children in elementary school. He complained how poorly we teach history in this country - especially local history. He said, "It's almost like they don't want to teach history yet because they're not sure how it's going to turn out." I don't know if I agree with that, but it does seem like the kids today don't know much about history. I'm sure my parents' generation said the same thing about us.

They're doing exterior building maintenance at my office. They're caulking, power washing, and replacing window gaskets. There are machines running, people talking, and lots of hammering too. Once, all of the noise stopped. Then - after a brief silence - I heard someone with a flat file trying to make something smaller so it would fit into its place. A file only cuts in one direction, but nobody ever showed this person the proper way to use a file. It was chattering across the workpiece and making an awful racket.

After about ten minutes, my boss walked over and said, "That noise is driving me crazy, doesn't that bother you?"

I said, "Just tell yourself it's a seal barking on a sunny day at the zoo, and then it doesn't sound so bad."

That comment brought a snicker from the other side of the wall and reminded me once again that there is no privacy for cube dwellers; but it also allowed my boss to go back to work without a lengthy discussion of how the fellow on the balcony was abusing his tool. After another five minutes, the barking stopped ... but then the pounding resumed.

My boss turned to me and said, "Yeah? Well what do you call that?"

"Oh that? That's the clubbing."

"What?"

"The clubbing ... of the seals ... the baby seals."

He had no clue! I finally realized he was too young; he had no idea what I was talking about. I suggested he run a web search for "clubbing baby seals" to see what I meant. It's nice to think there is a generation growing up that doesn't know what clubbing seals is all about. Maybe some things in history are better off being forgotten. Maybe some day, a generation will grow up without knowing what a daisy cutter is. Wouldn't that be nice?

Letting Go - Part 2

For the last two weeks, I've used all of my spare time to clean out my old office. The space has sat unused for the last seven years. It's taken that long to come to terms with closing my business. I sat at the same desk, in the same place, for more than ten years. It was a big old wooden desk that belonged to my father when I was a kid. It's not pretty; and I still remember when he accidentally burned a four inch patch on the top with a lit plumber's torch.

I'm a pack rat by nature. Every drawer, cabinet, and shelf was filled to capacity. Cleaning out that space was an emotionally draining process akin to sorting the personal effects of a recently departed family member. Even the white board was covered from top to bottom. Nestled amongst some notch filter diagrams and cartoon characters I found a quote left by my son long ago:

"It's what you learn after you know it all, that's important." John Wooden

Blind Faith?

Since the 1980's, Consumer Reports has been telling us how great Japanese cars are. Everyone believes it, but are they really any better? Japanese car owners are constantly saying how great their cars are as they drive them to the repair shop. We have a Taurus, and our son has a Sable. I've known other Taurus and Sable owners; and we all agree they have crappy transmissions. After a while they just don't downshift properly. The previous owner of our Taurus had the transmission replaced; and now it needs to be replaced again. It's an expensive job - maybe $1800.00, and the car isn't worth putting another transmission in; so I guess we will just live with the crappy downshifting until something major breaks.

On my ride into work this morning, the conversation went something like this:

"What's that shudder when you step on the gas?"

"Oh, that's the transmission. I think it needs to be replaced again."

"Really? Again? How many miles does this thing have on it?"

"About 220,000. It's such a great car. We drive it everywhere. I love this car. We bought it new. I'd like to keep driving it; but I've already had the transmission replaced twice, and it's so expensive."

"Twice? Really? So this will be your fourth transmission? How much does that cost?"

- sigh - "... about $4,000.00 ..."

- Gasp! -

"... but it's an Acura ... everything is expensive; and it's such a great car. We drive it everywhere, and ..."

Dumber and Dumberer

I can't believe people will pay more for bottled water than for gasoline, but they do. You've got to drill an oil well, ship the crude half way around the world, crack it into gasoline, truck it to a gas station, store it under ground, and then pump the gas into your gas tank. All of that for $3.49 a gallon. That's incredible! In New Jersey the gas stations still do the pumping at no extra cost; but people are always complaining that gasoline costs too much. Water, on the other hand, literally falls from the sky. But I've seen people happily fork over $2.00 for a 1-liter bottle of the stuff. I don't think we have the ability to judge value anymore. Could Idiocracy actually be coming true?

Quote from the label on bottled water: "Ingredients: Water"

Who would have guessed ... and shouldn't that say "Ingredient: Water"?